How to get your friends to go to a show
(A 12-step program indicating the correct technique for persuading people to join the local ska scene)

So, you’re home alone on a Tuesday night, and you notice that The Guilty Parties have a show Friday, but you have no one to go with. Bummer. Well, you’ve ALWAYS wanted to bring a friend to a show, so here’s your chance.

(Step 1)
In order to introduce your friends to the idea of “ska” you should first make sure that you have a good ska c.d. in your (a.) car, (b.) house, (c.) portable c.d. player, etc. (preferably the band that you are going to see).

(Step 2)
Make sure that the person you want to go with you hears the music. To do this you should make sure that the music is nice and loud and (a.) offer them a ride, (b.) drive past them and wave, (c.) bring the c.d. into their house, etc.

(Step 3)
Once their head begins to nod initiate a conversation about the show. (Sample conversation below)

YOU: Good music, huh?
THEM: Yeah, this is pretty good.
YOU: They’re even better live!
THEM: Really?
YOU: Yeah, in fact, they are playing this Friday at (location) would you like to come with me?
THEM: Sure, why not?

(Step 4)
After completion of the conversation, give them all of the info for the show. NOTE: if the parents won’t let them go, lie and say that they are staying at your place (after many tests, Kirstyn and I have found that this system works on strict parents.)

(Step 5)
If cost is an issue, offer to pay for them, or start a collection for the “bring cool kids to shows” fund.
If the conversation doesn’t work, there are many other options listed to assist you in your quest for show buddies.

(Step 6)
Tell your friend that you will pay them/pay for them.

(Step 7)
Tell your friend that there will be hot boys/chicks.

(Step 8)
Tell your friend that there will be food. NOTE: bring a box of triscuits in case they DO want food.

(Step 9)
Tell them that you need a ride.

(Step 10)
Beg them.

(Step 11)
Lie, and say that you are just going to the movies. NOTE: to make this lie seem more believable have them choose the movie time, but make sure that it’s not too early or too late.

(Step 12) WARNING!! ONLY USE IN DRASTIC SITUATIONS
Kidnap your victim, I mean friend. NOTE: duct tape can come in very handy for such situations.

If none of the above suggestions work, please contact me IMMEDIATELY billylover713@hotmail.com and you can take me instead.